Crumb Coated Cod

 My son tends to fixate on things.  From what I understand, this is a common trait for Aspies.  Since this is going to be a dinner topic entry, I will use a food related example.  A typical conversation may go something like this:

Son - Dad, what's for dinner?

Me - Hamburgers.

Son - What's in the hamburger?

Me - Meat. (me being a smart-ass)

Son - What else are you putting in the meat?

Me - Spices.

Son - What spices?

Me - Garlic powder, pepper, and salt.

Son - What type of pepper are you putting in?

Me - Black pepper.

Son - I don't like black pepper.

Me - You liked it just fine the past five meals we had.

Son - But I don't like black pepper today.  Now I'm going to have steps because I won't eat my dinner.  Do you have to fix hamburgers?  (This is where the pouting and frustration begins)

Me - Go play a game or watch TV and don't worry about what is in the meal.

Five minutes later...

Son - Dad, can you use something other than black pepper?

Me - No.

Son - (frustration levels rising again...anger brewing)

Four minutes later...

Son - Dad, what if you put oregano in the meat instead of black pepper?

Me - Wouldn't work the same.

Son - But I don't like black pepper.

Me - (My frustration levels start to churn)  Just watch your TV.

Three minutes later...

Son - Dad...

And so the story goes.  It does not matter what ingredients I use, what meal I prepare, or where we go, he finds something that he does not like and fixates on that one particular item. The obsession is not always negative.  He also does this with Legos, Star Wars, WWII, and any thing he takes an interest in - good or bad.  We try to "bump" him off the topic, but it does not always work.  So, I devised a devious plan...muhahaha...

Each week, I make a menu of dinner plans for the upcoming week and post in on the fridge door in plain sight.  I do not do this so that everyone can see what we are having; no, I do this because I will not remember what I have planned and will never cook the ingredients that I just purchased from the grocery store.  The side affect to this is, everyone can see what we are having...including my son.

This past week, I wanted to prepare a cod recipe.  From a previous experience, I realized I could not write "Cod" on Friday's date, so I nicknamed it; "3C w/Orzo AR 1" was all I wrote.  Fortunately, my ADD brain was able to remember that "AR 1" meant the Allrecipes website print out.  Once my son saw the planner, he zeroed in on Friday's meal.

Son - What's for dinner on Friday, Dad?

Me - You will find out.  Don't worry about it.  I really think you will like it so do not fixate on it.  This is going to be one of those meals that you get a check mark for trying (a new idea from the nutritionist - try a new meal without fussing, get a check mark.  Get 14 check marks, get a prize...so far we are up to two check marks and it has only been a week and a half!) 

Just hang out in the living room, no peeking, and no fixating.  It is breaded, so I know you will like it.  I am not going to tell you what is in the dinner, so don't ask.  You need to try it before I tell you what it is. (Yeah, I didn't think it would work either)

Son - Okay.

Me - (Thinking - wow, that was easier than I expected!)

So, on with the recipe...

Crumb Coated Cod - aka 3C w/orzo AR 1

Ingredients -

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 tablespoons water

1 envelope Italian salad dressing mix

2 cups crushed stuffing mix

4 (6 ounce) fillets cod (I used Kirkland/Costco frozen brand.  I think there are 5 or 6 fillets in a bag)

Directions - (It doesn't get much easier than this)

In a shallow bowl, combine the oil, water and salad dressing mix. Place the stuffing mix in another bowl. Dip fillets in salad dressing mixture, then in stuffing. Place on a greased baking sheet. Bake at 425 degrees F for 15-20 minutes or until fish flakes easily with a fork.

That's it.

I used olive oil instead of veggie oil, and seasoned bread crumbs instead of stuffing, mostly because we already had those ingredients and I didn't want to spend the money on similar ingredients.  I did double the dressing mix, oil and water mixture, but I wish I hadn't.  I ended up having about 3/4 more than I needed, so I poured the remaining mixture in with the fillets before placing them in the oven.  This also took care of the "greased pan" item.

I was not able to find the nutritional information, but the bread crumbs did not make a very heavy coat, and the rest of the ingredients are pretty good for you...except, maybe, the dry salad dressing mix.  Other than that, I would guess that this was a pretty healthy meal.  I added whole wheat orzo, can corn with dill, and baked beans (what?  the can had been sitting in the pantry long enough and I wanted them!).  So, I covered the grains, protein, and veggies.  Well, at least I think I did.  Hey, it was colorful, at least.  

The verdict

It is very important to remember that my wife and I do not really like fish.  We will eat it, but we are not crazy about it.  As a matter of fact, the ONLY reason we are eating it is because of that stupid health kick/marathon thing I am doing. 

My wife:  She gave it a 5 out of 5 stars.  This is actually a very rare occurrence for her.  Most of the meals I fix get a 4 from her, some get a 3 or less, but few get a 5.  No, I am not that bad of a cook...she and I are just very picky.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Me:  I gave it a 4.5 out of 5.  I thought it was very good, but I liked a different recipe for cod that we tried a month or so ago better.  I think the beans may have factored into the final score as well.  Alone, the beans would have received a 5 out of 5, but not so much with cod.  Lesson learned.

My son....drum roll, please...3.5 out of 5.  He really enjoyed it, until he found out it was cod.  Then he changed his score to the 3.5.  Which, if you think about it, is still pretty good.  Granted, he did not eat a lot, but he had what would amount to two or three bites for an adult.  This may not seem like much, but after what we have been through in the past few months, this is a huge step forward. 

Overall - YUM!  It will be fixed again. I think it will still need to be called 3C, though...at least one more time! 

Here's the link, if you are interested...Crumb-Coated-Cod

Disclaimer...(Yes, its a repeat of the last one...but the blog above is new!) First, let me say that I am not a specialist in Asperger's Syndrome, nor do I play one on TV. What I write or say are strictly my own personal observations and beliefs, so please do not sue me because I said something that made you do something that caused a misdiagnosis, or created a problem, or made you do something stupid. Have accountability, go see a professional, and leave my finances alone...besides, you really wouldn't get much anyway, so its probably not worth your time to call the lawyer on the back of the phone book to see if you have a case. Spend that time more wisely, like figuring out how to subscribe to my blog...and don't ask me about that because I'm not even sure how it works! Seriously, though, if some of the things I say seem like they sound very familiar in your family, set up an appointment with a true professional. While you are waiting for their callback, please, continue reading and leave a note!

Nutrition and Aspies

Kids are usually finicky to begin with when it comes to food.  If you have pizza, chips, cheese, peanut butter and jelly, a hot dog, a hamburger, macaroni and cheese, and maybe some spaghetti, you are most likely going to get the kid to eat.  Chances are I will eat, too, if that is all you had, but the problem is these items are not the best diet for growing folks (yes, I can still grow...unfortunately, it is my waistline that grows and not my height, anymore).  We all know kids need a healthy diet to grow to their fullest potential, but getting them to eat the good stuff is nothing short of a major undertaking.  If your kid is an Aspie, multiply that undertaking by a thousand. 

Then you have the 40-something adult who has never dieted in his life, would eat a pint (sometimes two) of Ben & Jerry's ice cream each evening for four nights in a row (What?  The grocery store had a BOGO sale!) on a regular basis, ordered and ate two Little Caesar's pizzas (back when they came side by side) plus garlic cheese bread for dinner, once had three steaks and five baked potatoes for dinner (much to the dismay of his sister and brother-in-law), would create pizza masterpieces when he worked for Domino's (mounds of cheese, bacon, hamburger, pineapple, ham, pepperoni, and whatever else I could pile on before heading home) to enjoy after the late shift, and stayed very clear of anything that closely resembles broccoli, cauliflower, mushrooms, and any other healthy food that grossed me out.  Yeah, I was far from a poster child for a health campaign.  Well, that's not true, I could have been the left side of the poster...you know, the "Before" side.  Don't get me wrong, I am still not on the "Right" side...but I am working on being less of the "Before" and more of the now.  In short, if I wanted it, I ate it...and didn't care.  But, I was also very active.  I played soccer, softball, football, rode my bike, and lifted many 12 to 16 oz glasses filled to the brim with chilled golden nectar.  Although, I did graduate to more of a brown nectar that comes from Boston as I matured...brewer...patriot...

Wow...ADD moment, sorry...let's get back on topic...

Now that I am no longer as active and my jeans do not fit like they did three years ago (I cannot figure out why that is...), I have decided to lose the gut, eat better, and run a half marathon in the fall.  Huh?  What was that?  Yeah, a half marathon.  HAHAHA...no, seriously.  Obviously, I cannot do this weighing in at fifty pounds overweight, and I am tired of my knee (the one I blew out playing soccer many, many moons ago) telling me everyday that I am overweight...not to mention it is pretty embarrassing to be out of breath after climbing a flight of stairs.  Yep...that's what I am going to do.

So, the first part of the journey was to buy an elliptical machine.  Remember, I have a bad knee, so I need something to help lose the weight with the least amount of impact...until I can get back to a decent weight...then it doesn't matter!  Woohoo!  Bring on the treacherous terrain!  Well, maybe we will do that after the half marathon...Anyway...elliptical machine...got it.

Second step - break up with Ben & Jerry and all of their friends.  Yeah...ummm...that one is a lot easier said than done.  I really miss those guys. :(  Excuse me for a moment while I wipe the tear forming in my eye...

Okay, I'm back...

Third step - cook healthful meals.

Fourth step - Wait, I thought I was getting back on topic...isn't this a blog about an Aspie kid?

Why, yes, it is, and now we are back on topic.

If I am being conscious about my diet or not, fixing meals my son will eat has always been a chore and a half.  Well, not always; there was a time when he would try just about anything.  For example, his favorite pizza topping USED to be spinach.  Unfortunately, those days are long gone.  One day he likes chicken, tomorrow he hates it.  He loves Grandma's breaded pork chops (as do I), but if I fix anything that has pork in it, forgetabboutit!  This is why I need to be creative...and maybe tell a white lie or two...okay, they are full fledged lies.

If pork is on the menu, it becomes...umm...chicken, yeah, that's it...it's chicken.  Pork BBQ is easy since the BBQ sauce masks the coloring.  Since he likes Sloppy Joe's and beef BBQ...you got it, that's what it is...sort of.  Cod?  That one was difficult and I did not succeed with fooling him.  But, man, was it good!  All that means is I have to be more creative with Cod in the future (and, by the way, I'm open for suggestions!).  The biggest problem is that he is very smart.  He can usually figure out the true ingredients.  Which tells me I need to step up my game a little.

Some of the techniques I have used in the past (other than lying) include; pureeing the questionable food item, disguising it as something else (see Pork BBQ above), sneaking it in when nobody is looking (TVP - Textured Vegetable Protein - more on that later), bribery, and the super fantastic idea of steps (I just realized I have neglected to write about this fantastic tactic!  I will devote a full page to this because it is so incredibly amazing...seriously!).  

In the effort to get him to make healthy choices, he and I devised a plan to track his eating habits for a week.  It was actually his idea, so I ran with it.  I explained how calories are what you want to watch, while keeping in mind that some calories are empty calories and serve no useful purpose while others are good calories.  I also went into carbs, sugars, protein, veggies, dairy and all of that other good stuff.

I am not a nutrition expert, but I've got enough knowledge to get him started.  I pulled up the "myplate" diagram from www.choosemyplate.gov and tried to explain the different segments and what balance means.  The best part about all of this is, he was/is actually interested...well, he was for a moment or two.  After logging in the first day's list, he promptly asked if he could have a piece of chocolate covered marshmallow (50 empty calories in one serving...which is about 1 inch by 1/2 inch in size).

So, since this is a work in progress, and I am guessing I am not the only one who has troubles fixing meals their kid will eat...let me rephrase that...fixing healthy, well-balanced meals that their kid will eat, I am going to try something.  My plan is to continue fixing the healthy meals and report back.  If the meal works, I'll explain the process with the ingredients.  If it doesn't, I'll refrain from the writing the entire recipe, but will still tell you where you can find it...if you so desire.  I hope that this will give other parents of Aspie kids (and non-Aspie kids, of course) a way to get their kids to eat healthy meals.  There is one catch, though...the meals must be tasty.  I love to eat, and I want to lose weight, but there is no way on earth that I will eat nasty tasting food, just to shed a few pounds!

 As always, I am open for suggestions and thank you for reading!




Disclaimer...(Yes, its a repeat of the last one...but the blog above is new!) First, let me say that I am not a specialist in Asperger's Syndrome, nor do I play one on TV. What I write or say are strictly my own personal observations and beliefs, so please do not sue me because I said something that made you do something that caused a misdiagnosis, or created a problem, or made you do something stupid. Have accountability, go see a professional, and leave my finances alone...besides, you really wouldn't get much anyway, so its probably not worth your time to call the lawyer on the back of the phone book to see if you have a case. Spend that time more wisely, like figuring out how to subscribe to my blog...and don't ask me about that because I'm not even sure how it works! Seriously, though, if some of the things I say seem like they sound very familiar in your family, set up an appointment with a true professional. While you are waiting for their callback, please, continue reading and leave a note!

How did he do that?!?

When I was a teenager, I did not think my parents knew anything.  There was no possible way they knew the problems I was facing growing up.  How could they?  They were old and not in high school trying to fit in, falling in and out of love with girls, fighting for popularity but trying to seem indifferent, trying to figure out what to do on the weekend, worrying if that one special girl liked me, or if they would score the winning goal in the tournament against Lincoln High (which, I did, by the way...but that story is for another time).  No, they had no idea what I was going through.

Dad, I don't need your advice about how I look and getting through customs!

When I turned twenty (or thereabouts), I started to see that my parents actually did know a thing or two.  Not everything, of course, but some of time, they got it right.  Thirty, yeah, they were pretty smart and they knew a lot more than I gave them credit for.  At thirty, I also began to realize that I knew things that teenagers did not know.  I also realized, later into my thirties, that what I thought was significant in my twenties was really not that important.  When I missed that New Year's party because I was sick and missed seeing that girl, who's name escapes me, it really wasn't going to be the end of the world, even though I thought then that it was...life went on, and now I barely remember why I wanted to see her in the first place.

I was learning that I will never stop learning.  Life's lessons would never stop, and that was okay.  What scares me now, at nearly forty, is that I think I have a pretty good grasp on things, but I am aware that I still have a lot more to learn.  Of course, I wonder, now more than ever, how much information my parents have at their young age and what they can still teach me.  And I wonder what it is that I think I know now will turn out to be quite insignificant in another ten years.

The part that scares me the most is, I see what my nine year-old son considers significant moments in his life.  He is petrified that he will have the "worst Christmas ever" because he isn't going to get a Corinthian battle helmet.  According to him, all he is going to get is a thousand Star Wars figures and nothing else.  Boy, life is rough for the little guy, huh?  He is confused about Santa, worried about being teased because he is wearing a "puffy" jacket (its actually a pretty nice ski jacket, but you can't tell him that...he thinks parents don't know anything), and concerned that we do not care about him because we "force" him to eat his veggies at dinner.

So, it makes me chuckle inside when these world-ending events are expressed through his words and frustrations, knowing that I cannot say anything to him that will make him think we actually know a thing or two...no, we have about another 12 years before that happens.  But, back to the part that scares me the most...what is it that I think I know now and that is cause for deep concern on my part, that my parents are secretly chuckling about in their motor-home, as they enjoy retirement in warm and sunny Arizona?  What do my parents know that I have yet to figure out?  One hint of the power of experience and knowledge came to fruition just today...


On occasion, my dad will send me e-mails with a link to some funny website, or some neat thing someone has done somewhere in the world.  Usually the link is related to something I like; for example, one recent link was about a model railroad set-up in Germany that was so grand the people who built it charge admission just for anyone interested in taking a gander at the miniature world.  Based on the link, I would consider buying a plane ticket to Germany just to have the chance at seeing this amazing model.  Another link may be of a Ferrari on a race track, or a photo contest in North Carolina where I might have a chance at winning a prize.  Whatever the link, historically, it has always had some significance and was, 99.9% of the time, of some interest to me.  But his last e-mail with a link embedded in it, left me feeling baffled.  I had no idea why he sent it to me...until today.

My dad's last e-mail (received yesterday), was a link to a Jacques Pepin video on how to make an omelet.  I cannot recall ever expressing a desire to learn how to create the perfect omelet, at least not within my dad's listening space.  As I was watching this strange video, I kept waiting to see something pop up on the screen and scare me half to death (my dad is a great prankster), or wondering when the pretty French lady was going to enter the screen, but neither happened.  No, this video was exactly what it said it was; "This is how you should cook an omelet."  Plain and simple.  Confused, I closed the window and went on about my day, not once thinking about the link, until today.

Here is where it gets scary...is this power he has something I get to look forward to?  Can he see the future?

Yesterday ended without a lot of exciting events and my dad's e-mail was sitting in my brain's recycling bin, waiting to be dumped out with the rest of the useless junk that is stored in there.  Fortunately, much like my computer, I forget to hit the empty button and clean out the trivial items in my noggin.  This morning, I awoke to my son knocking on my bedroom door.  His simple question, "Dad, will you help me make breakfast?"  Sure, I said as I somehow managed to muster the strength to roll out of bed...literally, roll out.

Once I found my socks, and shirt, my next task was to find my glasses so that I could see where I was going.  The glasses did not help much, since my brain was still foggy from the deep sleep I was enjoying so much.  But, I managed to make it downstairs to see a few ingredients and a cookbook on the island in the kitchen.  Leaning over the book was my son.  Apparently, he is enjoying this cooking thing, I thought silently. That thought was immediately followed with, oh geez, what is he trying to make...and will I have to eat it?

"Dad, will you help me make an omelet?"

My mouth twisted in a bewildered manner, my eyes widened with a mystified gaze, and my eyebrow rose with bemusement.  I couldn't repeat the expression if I tried...not even for a million bucks.  Did he just ask me if I would help him make an omelet?

How did he do that?  How did my dad know that I would need to know how to make an omelet the next day?  What told him to send me a link that I would have little interest in, only to find out that I really needed that enlightenment?  At that moment, I wished that I could have looked at my dad, thanked him, hugged him, and forced him to sit down with me and teach me everything that he knows...and, also, partake in the upcoming omelet.  Like my son, however, I have to learn these things on my own...in time...through life's little lessons and experiences, but how cool will this ride be!  Yippee!  I'm going to be able to tell the future, just like Dad!

So, Dad, if you are reading this, thank you.  Not only for sending me the perfect link, just when I needed it most, but for everything you have done for me and for everything you have not done for me.  I can now appreciate what you have gone through - making choices of when to teach, when to back off and let me fall, when to pick me up and carry me, and when to stand tall and say he's my boy (hopefully once or twice I made you feel proud!).  If I am half the dad to G that you are to me, my boy has a pretty good chance.  And, thank you very much for the very tasty omelet this morning...it was perfect. 

How to make an omelet - Click HERE

A very cool train set - Click HERE

I never thought I'd say this, but, thank you BOTH for teaching me how to cook!

Thanks for ALL of the awesome Christmases!

What have I created???

Being unemployed around the holidays does have its perks.  Not many, but some.  One of those perks is that I can spend more time with my son while he is on Winter Break and teach him some pretty neat things that I would not have been able to if I had a job.  Don't get me wrong, I really, really, really, wish I had a job right now, but...

Anyway, the last lesson he learned from me was about cooking.  Yes, I said cooking.  Thanks to my mother teaching me when I was a kid (see, Mom, I did listen to some things you said!), I have some inkling of a idea of what I am supposed to do while in the kitchen.  My feeble attempt to pass the minimal knowledge I have on to my son is met with the same enthusiasm I must have shown when I was the pupil.  Sorry, Mom, I should have listened more!  Maybe he will retain the lessons, like I did, somehow...hopefully.

The main lesson I try to always teach him is, a good cook always cleans up after him or herself.  This is the main lesson my mother taught me, but now that I am wiser, I am wondering if she really believed that, or if it was just a ploy to get me to clean up after her, instead of her after me, like any other day.  Either way, I am using the lesson for both reasons, now.  Yes, you should clean up after yourself, but something tells me a top-notch chef has his/her own crew to clean up after them...but don't tell that to my son.


Another lesson I was trying to teach him was that a good cook knows the taste of different spices and foods and is able to mix-and-match items that would taste good together without needing someone else to tell them it would work.  For example, if I am preparing a dish that calls for cheddar cheese and I, uhhh, I mean my son, happened to eat all of the cheddar cheese the other day while making melted cheese and crackers for a late night snack, I would know that the Colby cheese we have in the fridge is similar to cheddar and it would probably work well as a substitute.  Just as I would know that Swiss cheese would give the dish a completely different flavor. 


I also mentioned that a good cook is able to create his or her own dishes from throwing together various ingredients that he or she knows would work well together.  I used an example of what not to do, based on my personal experimentation when I was a youngin' and decided to put cinnamon (I love cinnamon) in spaghetti sauce (I love spaghetti, so why not mix the two!?!?), along with a few other spices I had lying around.  Needless to say, I learned from my mistake and cinnamon no longer comes anywhere near my spaghetti sauce! 


What I failed to realize is, his little wheels were turning and turning, concocting a new dish in his mind as I spoke.  Since dinner was already made and in the oven, he decided he was going to make dessert...without my help! So, in a sense, he was actually listening to me...he never listens when I say put your socks away, clean up your toys when you are done, or wear your coat in the cold weather, so why would I think he would listen now?  Here's what he made...


Grabbing a few round pita-like bread pieces for the base, he spread Nutella as the first ingredient.  Clearly wanting more, he then reached for the chocolate sauce, marshmallows, apples, grapes, strawberries, a Snickers bar from Halloween, and...wait for it...cinnamon.  Uh-oh, I thought..not the cinnamon!  Now, normally I would be ok with strawberries and chocolate, or marshmallows and Nutella, and maybe even a little cinnamon on an apple slice...hey, I might even go for a Snickers bar and grapes, but generally, I would not want all of these ingredients placed on a 100% whole wheat, healthy piece of pita bread...with cinnamon.


Fortunately, I was able to convince him that the apples, strawberries and grapes should be put on after the dessert sandwiches came out of the oven (the marshmallows had to melt, of course).  He placed it in the hot oven for a few minutes then asked me to help him take it out - smart kid!  I tried to hide my unenthusiastic look as best I could when I saw the warmed product. 

So, here he had made a dessert from scratch, baked it, placed the fruit on top, and was anxiously waiting for us to eat it.  But, I must say, the final presentation of the dish was very beautiful, and it almost look like it was made by a seasoned cook...but I still knew what it was made of.


As I hesitated to allow my taste buds to sample his perceived delicacy, I wondered what I was going to do if it was atrocious.  I shuttered at the thought of the healthy pita holding the sweets together.  I was afraid, very afraid.  Obviously, I did not want to squish any future desires for him to cook, and I certainly did not want to hurt his feelings after his valiant effort, so I practiced my surprised and pleased face in my mind, waiting for the right moment to let it show.

I took a bite...hmmmmm....yeah, there's the cinnamon...but just a hint of it...nice...yum, there's the chocolate sauce and melted marshmallows....hmmm, like a s'more...not bad....Snickers bar piece...uh-huh...tasty...and the pita...crunchy enough from the oven that it all blended together rather well.  HA!  I did not have to fake it!  It was actually, okay!  I don't think it will make the dessert menu at Legal Seafood or Ruth's Chris Steakhouse, but it wasn't bad, I must say.  Yes, I was impressed...that is, until the next day when he wanted to do it again, but with white sandwich bread (he used all of the pita), Nutella, cinnamon, and cheese...